Wakeup Breathing

are you a survivor………..0
admin posted in Uncategorized on July 2nd, 2009

The sound of screeching brakes, crushing twisted metal, a splatter of broken glass, and screams from inside the turned-over call. Call 911!

This is the first number that comes into your mind whenever an accident occurs.

Paramedics are called to the accident scene for a single purpose - to save lives. Upon approaching their patient, the first thing they do is look for vital signs. Vital signs include pulse and pulse rate, signs of breathing, movements, cries for help, and signs of consciousness – all these represent a glimmer of hope showing that the patient is still alive.

Next thing that a paramedic does is to look for signs of possible fracture, internal bleeding, shock etc. They try everything to keep the victim comfortable and safe from further harm. The essence of their action is focused on one thing - to rescue.

Just like a paramedic, the coping attitudes of an individual in the midst of a crisis in life will determine his capability as a survivor. This time however, the paramedic is also the victim intent to rescue himself.

Having a goal, which is to win over an adversity, will determine your survival. Consider the vital signs that characterize a survivor. You are a survivor if:

1. Your first instinct is to solve the problem and not point the blame. You find the real issue in order to find the best solution to overcome the problem. Unconsciously, some people focus their attention on the source of the problem. They ask who or what started it, in an effort to pinpoint blame.

However, is this the right time to do this? What good will it do now? The problem is already there. To capitalize on the problem in order to obtain absolution is self-serving. The best approach is to find the solution. From there, you can learn the lessons that need to be learned so as not to commit the same mistakes.

2. You seek help from other people. Talk to an expert on the subject surrounding the problem to find the best solution. Asking for support or assistance is not a sign of weakness; rather it is a sign of wisdom. Help from others could determine survival.

3. Your first reaction is to split the problem into manageable pieces. Work on the problem by fractions. Leave room to chew the food in the mouth. Fill the mouth to the brim and it won’t be able to move.

4. You know when to rest in order to regain strength. It does not mean giving up totally. Keep proper pacing to ensure you have enough stamina and energy. You cannot think clearly when you are confused. Regain your composure. In the same manner, you cannot think when exhausted. Regaining strength and composure could be all you need.

5. You can be like a garter. Flexibility has its value so make use of it. There is constant need to reinvent your self to be updated. Muster enough courage to be a master of your feeling. If the inevitable becomes imminent, accept it as part of the scourge of life.

6. You can express negative feelings in a positive way. “I may not be an excellent leader, but I am a good team player.” Likewise, you can express positive feelings and learn proper perspective in finding the right solution to the problem.

7. You have confidence and trust that the problem can be solved. The future does not look as bleak as it seem. There is always a reason to be optimistic.

You are a real survivor the moment you can grasp mentally the essence of your reaction to a problem - the essence to rescue yourself.

do you dare to be different….0
admin posted in Uncategorized on May 1st, 2009

Do you know how lemmings behave? They move in groups; they follow the pack.

Don’t you feel that most people are like lemmings? Many stay at the sideline waiting for brave souls to go in first. If they smell success, they jump in and join. Many wanted only to follow the direction that the crowd takes, rather than dare to trek the road less traveled.

Successful people are usually the first in the field. They are not crowd followers but crowd leaders. By the time other people jump on the band wagon the crowd leaders have either become leaders of the field or have moved on to different pursuits.

Being the first in the field many successful people employ unorthodox, eccentric, unconventional ways and ‘out of the ordinary’ actions. Their actions are often times hailed as innovative and creative, for they were the first to think about them. These people are so determined to make it to the top that they push themselves to think out of the box to address seemingly insurmountable difficulties so that they may be able to overcome obstacles.

You need not always be conventional. It is okay to try out uncommon approaches to solve a problem as long as these are within legal, moral and ethical rules, and as long as no one gets hurt in the process. Oftentimes, people judge pioneers harshly; other people perceive them as going nuts and losing their marbles for pursuing a different approach.

The same thing is true when it comes to the attainment of your goal. If you want to achieve success in life, try to be different. When was the last time you acted differently in pursuit of something you want? At times, it may be true that problems require unconventional solutions. Would you hesitate to be unconventional for fear of being an object of ridicule, even if your goal to success is on the line? The answer lies within you.

Successful people take CALCULATED risks as they pursue different approaches. They have gone through all the choices and painstakingly studied all details before deciding on the best option. Decisions are not based on tossed coins, for this is not a game of heads or tails.

If you will analyze it, acting unconventionally requires more brain activity than just going with the trend. For one, you have to look all possible alternatives, where merely following is just like copying what the others have previously done. Less mental activity is required when you just follow others.

So, how do you assess yourself? Are you a lemming or a risk taker? Do you follow the crowd or dare to be different? Do you take the conventional path or the road less traveled?

7 attitudes to avoid…..0
admin posted in Uncategorized on April 11th, 2009

Are you feeling down? Do feel a sense of hopelessness in your life? Do you feel depressed?

Depressive moods result from engaging in negative thoughts. Negative thoughts are triggered and reinforced by certain attitudes. Get to know what these attitudes are and find out how to curb them.

Extreme perfectionism. Some people are inclined to be perfectionists. Actually, there is nothing wrong in aiming for perfection. It becomes wrong when you feel miserable and disgusted with yourself if things didn’t turn out as planned. This feeling of misery is coupled with a sense of guilt. Why must you feel bad every time you fall short of perfection? Remember, nobody is perfect.

Pessimism. Think of it this way: Nobody stays at the bottom all the time. Sometimes, you may be up other times you are at the bottom. They say that life is like a wheel: it turns. Become an optimist and believe that every thing happens for a reason and that life can change for the better. It always does.

Desire for control. Realize that there are things you can change and there are things you cannot. Look at life on the positive side and try to be the best you can. Instead of trying to gain control over uncontrollable circumstances work on controlling your response to changes in your life.

Tendency to take on the blame. When somebody blames you for his mistakes or faults, do you feel bad about yourself? Even if you know you are innocent, do you take it personally? If you answered yes, you have to change this mentality.

Refuse to be disturbed emotionally. Shield yourself from remarks and accusations that are untrue. Assess the person making the accusation and the blame. He may be doing it just to save his skin and is only making you as a scapegoat. Ignore him and move into something worth your time.

Laziness. In business, there is such a thing called “due diligence.” Sometimes people are too lazy to check and double check information that they come up with wrong decisions that can severely affect their reputation, current position, or line of work.

Gather enough information first, segregate which are facts and which are not; thereafter, you can come up with a better conclusion. Take the extra effort and do not be lazy.

Inability to accept and give appreciation. You praise a lady for her nice clothes and she responds, “Oh, this is an old dress handed down to me by my sister!” Learn to graciously give and accept praises. Allow yourself to enjoy the benefits of being appreciated. Learn to express gratitude.

Distrust. This includes the inability to establish meaningful relationships with other people. It is difficult to establish friendship if you distrust majority of the people around you. Friends are extremely valuable in life. Having friends around you during bouts of depression can help ease the feeling.

There you have it – the 7 attitudes that fuel despair and misery. Be on guard against these attitudes and protect yourself from depression.

envy as an asset…..0
admin posted in Uncategorized on February 7th, 2009

Of all the negative character traits, envy is the only one with a redeeming factor. A healthy dose of envy is even good – think of it as fuel to drive you on your way to success or contentment. Don’ worry it’s perfectly normal for people to look at others and wish to have what they have. Partly because it is in our nature to make changes and partly because we really are not easily contented. The trick is to use that envy to better your life instead of using it to fuel your hate.

Use your envy to make changes for the better. Let’s say for example that you saw your friend’s new home and think it’s very nice. You can either wallow in self pity that you do not have the same house or be jealous and start to distance yourself from that friend. What if you use that envy instead as a blueprint? Think about how you can also make your own home better or get the home you want.

Or in business, for example – the other account group is a consistent top grosser and you really wish to be on the top too. The negative way is for you to start bad-mouthing the manager or the members or the company. The positive way is to observe and apply the way the other group works to your own. Wouldn’t that be better? You not only benefit but your group gets a more positive outcome too. You see, envy is that little flavor that makes competitions exciting.

You can also use your envy to channel your energies to a worthy goal or to refine your ambition. Use the person you envy not as someone to compete with but someone to emulate. For an athlete, it could be following your idols moves or training methods. For an entertainer, it could be practicing the same techniques. In business, it’s called benchmarking.

The key is to focus on the reason why you like your idol and try to be like him/her. You might find that you can’t exactly duplicate their style or rise to their level fame, but trying will give you an idea on how to do it on your steam. Who knows? Maybe you can even find a better way and surpass your model.

Envy is a two-edge sword – choose to wield it for the better and it becomes good to have.

do you have a story….0
admin posted in Uncategorized on January 4th, 2009

All procrastination is the result of us fooling ourselves. We always have a story why we have not completed a task or have not achieved the success we want. Procrastination lets us deny reality, refusing to accept responsibility for our lives. To eliminate procrastination you need to stop playing games with yourself. You won’t stop procrastinating until you accept the fact that you are responsible for your life. That may be more honesty than many people are capable of, but there is no other way to achieve a richer life.

The first step toward overcoming procrastination is recognizing that it’s a problem. Everyone has big problems and small problems, but most problems are made worse by procrastinating and not addressing them.

Does any of the following sound like your story….

- You know what you should do about a problem, and in many cases you know what specific action needs to be taken. But you still find reasons to avoid action.

- You are reluctant to do anything about a problem now, but vow to take action at some vague time in the future.

- You promise to take action when the “right” circumstances present themselves. By making the “action” dependent on something else, you justify your decision to take no action. You tell yourself that your hands are tied. You would like to do something but can’t so it’s not your fault.

Research has shown that you can develop new habits in just two weeks if you’re serious about changing. Think about people you know who always get things done. What are their work habits? How do they approach unappealing tasks? How do they stay focused?

We are not victims of our circumstances. You can overcome procrastination now, you can do the things that need to be done. Also you can learn to distinguish between the things that need to be done now and the things that can wait.

If you’re not where you want to be in life, take a hard look at yourself and make sure you’re not someone who always has a “story” about why it wasn’t your fault you couldn’t come through
on the job or address that problem. I am certain that if you’re someone that delivers results and not procrastination stories, you will be well on your way to creating a better life and achieving the success you desire.